Chris Hardwick is amazing. If you have time, watch this video. And the pen is awesome. Woooo
Author: Bri
Panic Attacks
Tonight, children, as I mentally prepare myself for the ACT tomorrow morning, I want to talk briefly about panic attacks. Have any of you ever had panic attacks? I have. My first panic attack was freshman year, I believe. I was in PE and all of the sudden I got really freaked out for no reason. I felt like my entire family had just been killed in a fire that destroyed my entire home. (Copyright infringement? Sorry Lemony Snicket) But seriously, it was crazy. I had trouble breathing so I just sat down in the corner, wrapped my arms around my legs, pulled my legs to my chest, and freaked out. Why did this happen? To be honest, I don’t know. It could have been that my friends had attacked -yes, literally attacked- me to try and get to my journal, which I had clutched to my chest all lunch period. I was a weird kid, ok? Anyways. Four vicious females jumped me at the same time to try and tear the personalized companion I never let leave my side. I don’t remember, but I think they might have wrestled it away from me once, but I got it back.
Anyways. It might have been that, or it might have been that I’m known to be stressed. All the time. And I’m one of those crazy artist types. Or, as Chris Hardwick puts it, “smarty-pants-creative types,”. I love Chris Hardwick. Gah. Sorry. Keep on track. So after that little incident, I was ok for about two months, before I had another panic attack over Christmas break. I was sitting at the desktop computer at night, which was right next to a very large window with no shade, and I was suddenly afraid that someone could see me right that minute and was planning on murdering me, or, God forbid, startle me by slamming their face into the glass creepily. (Is there a way not to do that creepily?) That wasn’t fun. Then I was panic-attack free, for the most part, until this year. Not only have I been emotionally overwhelmed, but the stress of school and debate is really wearing on my sanity. I’ve had at least three panic attacks since school started. I have managed to keep them at bay since Christmas break, but I’m worried they will come back. And of course, worrying makes panic attacks come faster. And knowing that correlation makes me worry more, which gives me more panic attacks. Sheesh.
But my hero Chris Hardwick, who is not only attractive and amazing and hillarious but also super intelligent, wrote an extensive, entertaining, and informative blog about getting rid of panic attacks. Even if you aren’t crazy like me, you’ll like it. So go. Now. Go read Chris Hardwick’s blog. You’ll thank me for it later.
Playlists
Since recieving an iPod Nano for my birthday (thanks again mom and dad!!!), I’ve realized the value of multiple playlists. In my quest for creating the perfect mix of music for every possible situation, I have made two playlists, one for falling to sleep to, and one for studying. No doubt I’m going to make more, but as of right now, that’s what I’ve got.
Today I’ll only reveal my study playlist.
Rush and Collapsed by Aly and AJ
Eleanor Rigby and Hey Jude by The Beatles
The Great Escape, Five Minutes to Midnight, and Dance Hall Drug by Boys Like Girls
I Will Hide Myself Away, If I Fail, The Fortunate, Save Us, and Lucky St. by Cartel
The Time Of My Life by David Cook
Holiday From Real, Dark Blue, Made For Each Other, You Can Breath, Spinning, Swim, and Annie Use Your Telescope by Jack’s Mannequin
Geek In The Pink (for variety and study breaks), Did You Get My Message?, Plane, I’ll Do Anything, The Remedy, Who Needs Shelter, On Love On Sadness, Tonight Not Again, I’m Yours, Live High, and Details in the Fabric by Jason Mraz
Waiting On The World To Change, Stop This Train, Bold As Love, and My Stupid Mouth by John Mayer
That’s Just The Way We Roll, Burnin’ Up, Shelf, and A Little Bit Longer by the Jonas Brothers
Control, Kelsey, True To Me, Tell Me What To Do, and California by Metro Station
End Up Alone and Sometimes by Nine Days
My Heart by Paramore
Our Time Now, You and Me, So Damn Clever, and Hey There Delilah by Plain White Tees
Outline Of A Love by Run Kid Run
One Girl Revolution by Saving Jane
Love is a Lie and When I’m Gone (Acoustic) by Simple Plan
As You Sleep, Down, the Runaway, and Space by Something Corporate
It really does help. Some songs are more upbeat that I’ve found make me work faster, some are slower so that I don’t get distracted, and some, like Geek in the Pink, Burnin’ Up, and That’s Just The Way We Roll are study break songs so I can breath.
WTF??????????????
BAD USER. BAAAAAD USER.
Actually, it’s cool. You just tried to access something that doesn’t exist, or that I don’t want you to see. It’s all cool, yo.
Just click “Bri’s Own World” to get back to the homepage and try again.
If the problem persists, contact me at brianna@brisownworld.com
Love,
Webmistress Bri
I’ve got my things, I’m good to go
For the musical portion of today’s witty addition to Bri’s Own World, I have awesome news. On January 31, which happens to be my birthday, Jason Mraz will be on Saturday Night Live!! He’s performing I’m Yours and Lucky! ON MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!
But that leads to my next topic for today: birthdays.
Doesn’t it seem like a strange thing to celebrate?
“Congrats, you’ve survived another year!”
I mean, doesn’t it seem a bit gruesome?
“Happy Birthday, Bri!”
“As opposed to what?”
“…eh?”
“‘Happy death day’? ‘Happy day before you die’? Why are we celebrating that I’m still alive? Do you know something I don’t? Huh? Oh, dear god, I have cancer don’t I? Does Antonio Banderas have cancer too? Oh no oh no oh no…”
Maybe that’s not exactly how things are going to transpire, but you get my point. It’s a bit of a downer to celebrate being alive, don’t you think? I guess maybe it’s to compensate for the fact that, once most of us are dead, no one will remember us. So the longer we live, the better chance we have to be remembered. “Congrats, Bri! You’re 17 years more famous than you were when you were born! Awesome job not dying yet!”
…I have no way to end this blog. *Insert witty comment here*
Important News
So I’m bored. I’m signing up for next year’s classes and I finished before everyone. But I don’t want to go back to Spanish so I’m staying here, pretending not to be done.
I have some important news, though, and I didn’t want to forget to mention it.
We at Bri’s Own World have the pleasure of welcoming our first guest blogger soon.
And it is…..
BRIAN MANDABACH. He is a published author who wrote the incredible Or Not?
And he AGREED TO WRITE ONE FOR ME!!!!!!!!!!!
Top Ten reasons to work in a nursing home
I know I lament about my job a lot, but it’s not ALL bad. However, I will be making another list soon…. ten reasons why NOT to work them. For now, I’ll leave my cynicism at home.
NOTE: All these reasons are reasons to be an activities assistant in a nursing home. I’m not sure how being a therapist or a nurse is.
1. Half the time, all you have to do is sit next to a resident and listen to them talk, and you get paid for it.
2. Lots of material for funny stories. I’ve seen old people get into fist fights. Now that’s a conversation starter.
3. Sometimes, there’s a resident that is difficult with everyone but you, and it makes you feel accomplished. I had a lady like that, who was pretty mean to everyone, but I got through to her and she actually liked me.
4. It’s less depressing than working in a children’s hospital. At least the residents here have already lived their lives.
5. There’s always at least one person at each of the activities who just loves whatever you’re doing. Whether it be the little old lady smiling and singing along to gospel music or the lady playing Yatzee, the effect is always gratifying.
6. You don’t have to look manicured all the time. When I go to work, I wear nice pants (dress code), a plain shirt, and comfy shoes. I don’t bother with contacts, makeup, or hair, because the old people aren’t going to complain, and I could care less about what the CNAs think of me.
7. Because I’m not a nurse or CNA, I don’t have to deal with puking, pooping, or anything related to that. If someone is throwing up or their oxygen is running out, I just go get a nurse, because I don’t have the training to do anything more. Ah, legitament excuses.
8. If you’re under the age of thirty, the old people are constantly complimenting you. Every day I go in there, no matter how crappy I look, at least one resident tells me how pretty and thin I am. It’s a definite confidence booster.
9. You can talk as loud as you want, and no one will tell you to shut up, because chances are, the residents still won’t be able to hear you.
10. If you get scheduled to work when they plan to play a movie, you can sit in the back, eat free popcorn, and do your homework.
RETICENCE UPDATE!!!
The manuscript of my new novel, Reticence, just hit 100 pages! I’m just passed 31,000 words (31753 to be exact), which is really exciting! Addicted is 36,000, roughly, and the minimum for a novel is 40,000!!
I’M GETTING SO CLOSE!
And it’s not total crap! It’s a lot of crap, yes, and it needs a TON of editing, but I refuse to edit until I completely finish the first draft. Otherwise, I will never finish it. Write first, edit later. Write that down.
I’m very excited. Things are coming together nicely. I’ve got a rough outline for the rest of the book, so I know where I’m going, finally. But this poor character. I’ve basically lumped all the awful things that I’ve gone through, plus some fictional things, into a three month period. She’s going to need some serious therapy. Hee. I love being mean to my characters.
I depress myself sometimes.
Goodnight!
Incredible
18 people are online on Facebook, and not one of them is someone I want to talk to. Well, I could talk to a couple, but they aren’t the people I really want to talk to. Don’t ask, because I’m not going to explain.
But do you know what I love? When people ignore you. No, really. I just love that feeling of absolute worthlessness. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, eh? If that were true, I could be a gold medal weight lifter.
There is more than one way to ignore someone. One of which is just that, avoiding or excluding someone. Another, though, is refusing to write someone back, return a comment, reply to a message or email. The first one, admittedly less subtle, actually is better than the second. Know why? Because the second one is harder to detect. Let me take you through an example.
Lets say you email or call someone, someone you’d kind of like to reply. Maybe they’re a crush. Anyways. After a day, or maybe even less time, you get a bit restless. No one else is talking to you, so there’s nothing to distract you. You just kind of sit there, in front of the phone, or the computer. Well, ok. Maybe they’re hanging with the family, or friends. Maybe they just didn’t see it yet. So you get over it, go eat or whatever.
After two days, you know that they have HAD to either have gotten on the internet or checked their messages. After staring at the communication device of choice for a while, you rationalize. Maybe they checked it as they were leaving, and didn’t get a chance to reply. Yeah, that must be it. You give yourself a couple more minutes to stare; maybe they’ll get online or call you back. No such luck, so repeating the rationalization like a mantra, you go back to your life.
After three days, you start freaking out. They’re had AMPLE time to check and reply to whatever you sent them. Why haven’t they replied?? What if you said something that made them mad? If it was an email, you read the sent message closely to identify any potentially offensive lines. You find none. If it was a phone call or text, you run over what you said in your mind. No, nothing too bad. Well, maybe they’ve just been really, really busy. It’s a stretch, but who knows. You spend way too much time by your phone or computer, but the time all blurs together until you have to go do something else. If not for the toilet, you may have never moved. There’s always an explanation, you tell yourself.
Five days later, there are three options:
1. They got it a while ago and forgot to reply
2. They have no intention of replying, whether they read or listened to it or not.
3. They’ve died in a tragic accident.
You rule out the last one, since you just asked someone and they assure you that whoever you’re trying to talk to is still, in fact, breathing. By now, this is getting ridiculous. So you write, call, or text them again, asking what the heck their problem is. Now, another one of three things will happen:
1. They write or call back and apologize. They’ve been busy.
2. They come to your house to apologize in person, with a dozen roses.
3. They ignore that as well.
If it’s option 3, the process I’ve just described repeats itself, only worse. I mean, if you don’t want to talk to me, just freaking tell me. It’s easier for everyone. All this alluding my calls and email crap is cowardly. ESPECIALLY when I know, for a fact, that you’ve had time and the ability to get back to me.
For the record, I’m not really talking about anyone specifically, I’m just giving my opinion on the subject.
My head hurts.
I look at all the lonely people
I know I wasn’t going to post a music blog today, but after an argument with a friend on Facebook (“friendly disagreement”) I was looking up the cover of Eleanor Rigby by Doxology. She seems to think that this version is better than the original. I disagreed on principal, then decided to see for myself.
What I found was
1. It’s not better, I was right, but also
2. Everyone and their brother has done a cover for it
Seeing as this is my favorite Beatles song, I was disturbed and intruiged, and promptly listened to many of them. My thoughts?
Doxology: Has merits, but eh. It’s a more mellow song. Leave it mellow, man.
The Fray: I actually liked this one alright, but it sounded a bit off.
Oasis: The recording I found (I was on YouTube) was a bit quiet. I think they were playing it for a sound check before a show. It was alright, I suppose…
David Cook: I hate to admit it, but his version is what got me back listening to the Beatles. Again, has merit, but it’s not mellow anymore. Meh.
Thrice: A bit too hardcore.
Pain: The singer sounds perpetually stoned. And looks it…. this version makes my head hurt.
Godhead: They even had a music video. This was really weird… I’m going to go cut myself at an emo concert now…
Ray Charles: Meh. Not very good in my opinion. He looked like he was having fun though.
Overall, please stop trying to do sucessful Beatles covers. It will never work.
However, on Pandora, I found this really great cover group who I think does pretty much all covers… New Found Glory. They did a cover for Goo Goo Dolls’ Iris, and it actually wasn’t bad. The original was much better, but still. They also did a cover of King of Wishful Thinking, by a band whose name I can not remember. So… yeah. Music Nerd Bri is going away now.