Heeeey guys. I’m back from the asylum again And I’m not going back!
-Yeah, sure Bri, whatever you say
Ignoring! So anyways, while I was at the funny farm…
-Yawn
Still ignoring! I met this guy, name was A-A-An-t-t-on-n-n…
-Need help?
NO! No. I’m going to say his name without going crazy and stealing something that reminds me of him.
-Yeah, ok, you do that, Bri.
His name was… A-A-Anton-n-n-eeee—
-Seriously, just spit it out.
His name was… THAT ONE GUY WHO VOICED PUSS IN BOOTS. Loopholes rock.
-No, see, that doesn’t count. Stop being a wuss. BE STRONG, WOMAN!
Shush. So I met …. Puss In Boots… and we had a really good time. It turns out he was in there because he was overwhelmed by a wave of sexiness when he looked in the mirror one morning and then ran around Hollywood naked.
-Now THAT’S facinating.
Shut up.
-You know, even though you found a loop hole around the name, you’re still talking to me, which means you’re still crazy.
Am not! You’re just my… concience! My therapist told me about it. Conciences tell you when you’re doing something wrong. They’re the angel on your shoulder.
-Heh. You got the wrong concience.
W-What?
-I ain’t the angel, honey, I’m the…
NO! BAD CONCIENCE! BAD!
-PHANTOM OF PAPERCLIPS!!!
AUGH!!!! ANTONIOOOOOOOOO! HELP ME!!! COME BAAAAAAACK
-Hee hee. It’s so easy it almost isn’t fun anymore. Almo- AUGH!
*Note from author’s doctor: After attempting to saw off all her skin with a blunt steak knife, but then deciding it was too much trouble, Bri ran to the nearest mall and stole all things that had anything to do with Antonio Banderas. She then assaulted a mall cop with a Zorro soundrack. Please, all of you who care for her, don’t send her any Antonio merchandise to cheer her up. And please-please- don’t send anything with the letter “Z” ANYWHERE. We hope she’ll be able to function normally in society, but after the tenth time (that’s what it is, isn’t it?) we’re starting to have our doubts. Adeiu.