Twice now, I’ve been a part of a rather strange exchange, one that’s only ever happened a couple times before. I’ll be walking towards a building, obviously intending to go inside, and a boy will hold the door for me. Normally, this isn’t a big deal, people hold doors for each other all the time, but what makes these two situations anomalous is the distance. See, both times, I was a good 10-20 feet from the door. If these boys had continued walking instead of waiting to hold the door for me, the door would have shut behind them. Usually, this is a good measure of how close one must be to have the door held.
From The Billings Gazette, a blogger had this to say on door holding etiquette:
1. If eye contact is established, you must remain to hold open the door
2. If there is more than one person entering, and one member of that group is a male, it is his duty to take over the door holding duty until all women have entered or he is relived in the same fashion
3. Anyone who has their hands full or is carrying a large load gets the door held open for them, regardless of eye contact or gender
Now, back to me. In neither of these situations I speak of was eye contact established or did I have my hands full. I was completely capable, in both situations, to hold the door for myself, again seeing as the door would have fallen shut on its own far before I could get to the door. So why did these two boys break the social contract of door holding?
According to the first comment on the aforementioned door etiquette tips, “How long you hold the door is directly proportional to how hot the woman is.”
Could this be the reason these two boys decided to wait an extra fifteen to twenty seconds to hold the door open for me? I’d certainly like to think so. The only other possibility I’ve been able to come up with was that these two gentlemen are just particularly polite and not in a hurry. As I currently reside in Oregon this makes sense, but is anyone really that polite? The only reason these two events stood out so much was because these two boys really did go out of their way to allow me easy access into a building.
Weigh in?
I have noticed a similar phenomenon of people waiting abnormally long times to hold open doors (I admit I sometimes do the same). Here though it is almost a contest to see who can be the politest in holding open doors. I think that people are so much more cognizant of who is around because they are constantly meeting new people and that this leads to more people holding open doors for others. I do think that part of it is that the guys were just interested in you.
SCORE!