So remember that one time when I said I wasn’t going to blog for at least a week and that was last Thursday and now it’s the next Wednesday? Well, either way, BLOG!
For the past five days, I have been at Smith Rocks, which is a rock climbing/ hiking location in central-ish Oregon nearby Bend. I was on a trip called a “Voyage”, and it was kind of a pre-orientation trip for those interested. There were only four other kids on the trip with me, plus the two college student trip leaders and the 30-something who came along to help out with the technical side of rockclimbing.
Let me just tell you… it was incredible. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so enlightened or so bewildered in my life. So let’s take it from the top.
Day one, we meet at the Outback* building right off campus. Right next door is this amazing little cafe called “Maggie’s Bun’s”, so I got up a tad earlier to grab an Americano and a blueberry muffin top there before meeting up with my group. Once I did meet up with my group, I swiped an apple and just listened to people talk. I’d only met everyone the night before, and briefly at that, so that was a little nerve racking.
The drive up was way more comfortable than I expected. I sat in the back of the suburban between the two girls, and the two boys and the 30-something technical dude sat in front of us. We all started talking almost immediately, which was amazing, and I admitted right off the bat that my parents were a little concerned that I would isolate myself. From then on, I was rarely left on my own.
When we finally reached Smith Rocks, we transferred some stuff to our day bags and set off for our first climbing location, called Rope-a-dope. The climbs weren’t particularly challenging, but they were fun and a good warm up. I’ve never climbed outside before, it’s always been in a gym, and I didn’t know what to expect. It was a lot different, but I really enjoyed myself.
That night we made dinner and I set up my sleeping pad/bag near the trip leaders, who were sleeping outside. I figured, why not? I’m here for the outdoors, and the tent was kind of crowded. How bad could it be?
Bad. Not only did I not have a pillow or something to use as one, but it was also freezing cold and I only had two thin layers on. I spent that first night tossing and turning while trying not to toss and turn because my sleeping bag was only warm when I stayed still.
Because I slept so poorly, I was awake when the trip leaders got up to start breakfast, so I followed them and helped set things up. I got into a habit of this, and ended up helping cook and clean breakfast every single morning, not to mention the other meals.
The second day’s climbing was a lot more fun, because there were bigger rocks and we didn’t have as inclined of a hike to get there and back, which was nice.
Let’s pause for a second to talk about my group. We have Ethan, the senior trip leader, who is a soccer player and a master climber. We have Hanna, the sophomore trip leader, who is a lacrosse player and seasoned climber. We have Brad, the 30-something who is basically a mountain man**. We have Conner, the health enthusiast and tennis player. We have Ryan, the baseball, football, and track star. We have Maya, the ex soccer player and cheerleader. We have Ellen, the other soccer player. And then we have me. So I was at a distinct disadvantage for the hiking portion of this trip, which was a lot bigger than I expected. More on this later.
The third day we had a pretty big hike up to our next climbing location, but it ended up being one of the best walls, so I couldn’t complain for long. Ethan adopted a praying mantis he named Henrietta. We played ultimate frisbee, ninja, and capture the flag with a group of students from Whitman college, and injured two of them. Brad taught us stuff about constellations and I spent my third night under the stars, only slightly more comfortable.
The final climbing day, we started off by hiking. The plan was to boulder, which is basically climbing without harnesses more horizontally than vertically. The hike wasn’t too bad before we reached the first climbing spot, and I specifically positioned byself behind the boys as a challenge. I’m going to keep up. I promised myself. I’m not going to be the only one behind.
This was kind of a theme for the trip. I think one of the reasons I tried to help out with the cooking and cleaning and was early for everything was so I wasn’t a hassle. That’s always my goal on group trips; if you can’t be useful, at least don’t be useless. And I really wanted to be able to keep up with everyone on the more endurance based parts of the trip. I held my own really well during the climbing portions, but the hiking was kind of killing me.
After we finished bouldering, we continued our hike, and I continued my internal mantra of keep up keep up you can do it push through the pain just keep up with Ryan he’s not going that fast anyways. But then we reached the hill.
The hill, which led up to a place called Misery Ridge (aptly named, let me tell you), was about a half mile of the steepest, most zig-zaggy trail I’ve ever seen. At that point, I realized, no matter how hard I tried, I would not be able to keep up. (I will add pictures once my Voyage buds add me as a friend on Facebook and upload the ones they took)
But gosh darn it, I was going to keep walking if it killed me. It was slow going, but I didn’t stop. I did not pause until everyone else took a water break, and I did not falter the entire way up. It hurt so bad, and I was breathing like I’d never have enough again. And once I got to the top, everyone was watching me all concerned, but I was so proud of myself. I am in the worst shape of my life, and I don’t think I’ve ever been in so much full body pain, but I finished it. I didn’t stop and I didn’t make excuses. I didn’t complain and I didn’t back down.
It was at that point that I realized what that trip had done for me. Before, I would have complained, and stopped every switch back. Before, I probably wouldn’t have even agreed to do it in the first place. Before, I wouldn’t have tried all of the things that I tried, and I wouldn’t have opened up so much to perfect strangers.
I realized that I want to be one of those people who is outside all the time, in enviable shape, and has cool, rare talents other than elbow licking (which everyone was impressed by). I want to be one of those people that doesn’t have to pause in the middle of a sentence because she’s winded. I want to be one of those chill, happy-go-lucky adventurers. I want to be spontaneous. I want to be free of all the preconceived notions I have about myself and other people. I just want to live.
After we finished the most hardcore thing I’d ever done, we packed up camp and traveled about 45 minutes away to this amazing lake. It felt so good to get in the water and feel the congealed sweat and sunscreen I’d been accumulating wash free. We ran out of propane in the middle of dinner, so while we waited for Ethan and Brad to make a run for more, the boys made up a frisbee game and the girls built an epic sandcastle city by the water. It was an incredible end to an incredible day, which we all finished off by watching a blackberry eating contest and sleeping outside together on the grass watching a caterpillar inching around*** and the stars an unblemished sensation in the sky.
The last day of the voyage was a rush of oatmeal, packing everything up, and driving the three hours back to the college campus. We as a group had come so far, and I couldn’t have asked for a better introduction to college. I actually spent from about five thirty to ten with Ellen and Maya, just walking around the campus and Forest Grove, getting amazingly yummy and cheap ice cream and finding sketchy ATMs.
I’ll talk more about life in the dorms later, probably in a collab video for mine and Craig’s channel, but for now I should get ready for bed because I’m a bit drowsy. A real bed will be a nice change, but I think I’m going to miss seeing the stars.
*Outback is a program for Pacific students to go on trips to the outdoors.
**Brad liked to disappear for several hours at a time, and we always speculated that he was doing something manly and heroic. “Where did Brad go?” “Oh, he’s probably wrestling another bear.” “Oh ok.” By the end of the trip he must have battled every bear in the area.
***Ethan, our bug man, named her Anne. At one point he flicked her away and it ended up hitting me in the face.
Loved your account of the trip!